Part of an Interview with Nikki Taylor BEFORE Her Retirement

Tell me a bit about yourself as an introduction. I'm especially interested in how you chose your name.

Nikki? I believe that's what I was calling myself when I was first rescued.

(I had to interrupt because I heard that particular recording). Actually, Nikki, we called you that because you kept saying "Nick," or what sounded like "Nik" and we thought it was probably your trying to tell us your name.

(rueful smile) Yes. I don't remember those days very well, I'm sorry. But it did sound right. Anyway, I'm Nikki now. As for Taylor, everything I am now is new, made from nothing. Jed said I could taylor myself after anyone or no one, and so Taylor seemed like a good choice for a surname.

As in "tailor-made."

Yes. I'm Nikki Taylor because I want to be Nikki Taylor.

Are you comfortable talking about your past now? Can you remember more? And Jed's role within it?

Dr Kirkland, there are still blank holes in my memory. I doubt I'll ever be comfortable talking about my past. As for Jed...Agent McNeil saved my life. He'll always be part of me because he's been with me since day one. Of my new life as Nikki Taylor, I mean.

Do you want to know more about your past?

(Silence)
Not really.

Are you afraid?

(almost a whisper)
I...of course. I don't really want to remember the torture, Dr. Kirkland. I remember enough already, and the nightmares, although receding, are still there.

What do you want for your future then, Nikki?

I would like some peace in my life, where I don't have to manipulate people or have them manipulate me. (smiles) I'm not talking about Jed, you know. He's the exception.

Because he saved you?

That. And because he needs to get certain things done, in any way he can. So really, I don't fear him manipulating me since I don't have anything he needs done. I was never part of any mission he undertook. What I want is balance, but I'm not sure how to get that. I'm working on it, though.

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This excerpt was from before Nikki Taylor regained her memory about Leah Harden and most importantly, Ricardo (Rick) Harden. Hindsight is twenty-twenty, they say. I'll have to listen to more past recordings for more insight.

Any insight from you will be put in my files too.